Assault Android Cactus for the Xbox One

This game popped up on my Xbox Live membership as a free download and I was very surprised. The gameplay takes the sphincter clinching action of a bullet hell shooter and combines it with the dual stick control mechanism of the classics Robotron/Smash TV. Since Robotron and Smash TV are some of my all-time favorites, I instantly gravitated towards it.

The background story consists of Junior Constable Cactus responds to a distress call and ends up stranded on a crippled space freighter under attack by its own robot workers. Being VERY Japanese in nature in both character design and dialog, I was waiting for an “All your base are belong to us” moment.Vibrant colors, fast-paced action and an ever changing play field splash across your screen at a frantic pace leaving a few “what the hell just killed me” moments.

Assault Android Cactus has a variety of characters each with different weapon systems you unlock progressing through the game. Each new character doesn’t always mean a better option. Some just completely suck and I tend to gravitate towards certain characters.

This game has a great difficulty curve to it. Upper levels are fairly difficult and boss battles will take more than one try to beat, but so did Mike Tyson in Punchout, so I dont feel too bad. Even with the difficulty it has that “one more try” aspect to it.

Reviews weren’t the greatest at the Microsoft Store, but this isn’t a game for everyone. Pro players who do nothing else for a living would find it boring and repetitive, glad I am not one of those “gamerz” and can enjoy some classic arcade action.

Screenshot courtesy of